Thursday, May 27, 2010

My Brother

I love my brothers. In fact, I wish there was a better more fitting word than love, because sometimes it just doesn't seem to fully explain how I feel about my brothers. My oldest brother is Jonathan (left) and my youngest brother is Joshua (right).

Jonathan is a lawyer in Phoenix and Josh... he will be Vegas' new addition in about 2 weeks. (I apologize ahead of time Jon, this post is about Joshie... I owe one to you later!)
To say that I am proud of my little brothers accomplishment is an understatement. He received a promotion which is what will be bringing him to Vegas. I am excited for his new challenge and for him to spread his wings and all that fun stuff that goes along with transitioning into a new phase in your life... etc.
Unfortunately its also incredibly hard for me to keep it together right now. I wish I could separate out the emotional part of it and just be 150% pumped for you. I know about the excitement of Vegas and I know how fun of a place it is for a 23 year old man to be. I know how thrilling it is to get your very own place without 'roomies' and to start a new job, meet new people and try new things. I know all these things and the instant that I bring your moving up to ANYone, they remind me of all these things.

But I have so much emotion attached to this, that I just wish someone would take it away. I was 5 years old when Josh magically appeared into my world. I was definitely old enough to know and remember what was going on. Josh was like my very own real life baby doll! I loved to help do things for him and even though EVERYone knew Oshie was spoiled, it didn't matter to me (after a while and realizing that him being spoiled was NOT going to change. I think about him moving and I cant help but think about how little brother Josh. I remember he would absolutely NOT take a shower unless I sat in the bathroom talking to him. I dont even remember what we talked about at 3 years old, I just remember sitting on the toilet bowl listening to him gab away. I remember him screaming and crying and being so nervous when he fell backwards into the jumping cactus in our front yard, and I can remember how swollen his little body was once we finally got all the little stickers out. I can remember watching him ride his bicycle like a raving lunatic, pumping his little legs over and over and his little dardevil sunkissed face smiling the whole time!

Its very hard for me not to see my little Joshie, when I look at my brother.
Most people know Josh for the incredibly fun loving person that he is, but I know him for so much more than just that.
I so wish that I could just push it aside, better than I have been doing and just be there and be genuinely, without worry, excited for him. I wish that I could take my mom's worry away. Actually I just wish that I could give him the dream job he deserves, a little bit closer to home. I know he will be successful and just fabulous in Vegas... my brother can do anything!
I am just going to miss him so very much. He really just holds the most precious place in my heart.

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